SUNSHINE @ 360°

Suspended

2011-07-21T19:52:00.001+08:00

Sorry,

Production is limited.

Luka Demokrasi..

2011-07-10T14:07:00.000+08:00

Semarak Menyala by A Samad Said

Peludah Warna : A. Samad Said

2011-07-09T15:23:00.000+08:00

Peludah Warna by A Samad Said

Darwin started at home, young.

2011-06-30T18:05:00.002+08:00

The image above and the collection of Darwin's scribbles captured my interest to blog. Science is relatively a very interactive field of interest. This is where I find freedom is beyond comprehension.

Abdul Samad Said

2011-06-30T18:04:00.000+08:00

Unggun Bersih by A Samad Said

Hurmmm...

2011-05-28T14:37:00.002+08:00

phdcomics

It is summer now!

MJ impersonator

2011-05-28T12:16:00.004+08:00

This is just too adorable to keep it for my own. IKBC snaps very good kitties pictures at their very best moments. This is just one of the many!

source : IKBC

So long...

2011-05-27T23:53:00.003+08:00

I guess I never come to terms in accepting their demise..

nor anywhere near it...

I still tear at the thought of them..

This has been the first time after 10months have passed... that I look back at the albums of photos I took of you. Flashing memories that was once so fond to be re-winded again and again. Now, I can't afford to play those thoughts repeatedly...

MY heart is heavily soaked.

Rest in eternal peace my little ones...

Always in my mind,

deep in my heart,

genuinely apart of my soul.

Or getting old?

2011-05-24T18:37:00.005+08:00

You know you are growing up..

when you pay no attention to those who ridicule you

when you felt nothing with those playing games behind you

when you no longer pity being victimized of jealousy and hatred

when you catch your breath after being hated, drowned and hurt

when you hurt not by those who is beyond forgiveness

when you forgive those who intentionally grieve you

when you grieve overnight and recover steadfast

when you can easily become light hearted to whatever had held you captive

when you hold no grudge anymore and move on

when you know how to live a life being yourself

and realize life is bigger than itself.

Urchin sings too?

2011-05-18T10:08:00.004+08:00

This is a very interesting field of research.

I have been hearing a lot of clicking and fidgeting sounds in highly-urchin infested HK waters. Little do I know that they really do come from urchins!!!

I know that not only mammals, whales, fishes, crustaceans make sounds underwater but now urchins too???

Wonder what indications do they present?

I miss being a very curious marine biologist. It is boring working with rocks... Too safe.

Photo : The Age

The Oceans by DisneyNature

2011-05-08T16:46:00.003+08:00

Strongly recommended.

or the link : http://youtu.be/uXLbQrK6cXw?hd=1

An afternoon at work with Mr Zhuang

2011-05-07T17:32:00.005+08:00

Having some company that you really enjoy around you, especially at work, changes your day completely.

Mr Zhuang came to my office and joyfully leaped around and playfully nudge my shins every now and then. This young chihuahua cross has got endless energy until he drained himself and settled for some vibration-mode-off photography.

Nevertheless, the afternoon seems easier to work-by.

Goodnight Mr Zhuang..

Words ringing in my head

2011-04-26T23:52:00.002+08:00

Hang in there.

That's the favourite word used by everyone when they tried to talked me out of what I had in mind. I held onto it up til now.And it works. Because I trust these people.

A journey, if I were to tell out aloud, makes eyes widen with disbelief. Expecting bombardment of questioning thoughts. Unsurprisingly, I never utter a single word about it. Not that I'm swollen with ego. there's nothing to be proud of being caught in this drama. But, I am not too keen to share about it as well. Having to go through this journey already drained more than half of me. I still need the other half for these remaining years..

Lately, it has been asphyxiating. NOthing seems to be hitting the right note. And I have been battered with fatigue and endless pressure...

I miss living my life. And now, I am saying as if I am forced to live a life that I have no liken to. Strange feeling.

But, I find no words to debate against it.

So, I need to keep holding on.

Daddy, I want to come home

2011-04-26T23:43:00.002+08:00

I had wanted to spill it all out to my dad tonight. Want to tell him the truth. Want to have his blessings. Want him to understand how important it is to me. Want him to know what I have been through.

Determined, I called. Hoping that dad will answer and we will have a heart to heart talk. I love how dad squeal in delight whenever I surprised him by calling his office. Reminds me of how much I miss spending time with him at home. And how much our character resembles each other.

The ringing lasted forever.

At last, there were no answer.

Is this an omen?

I won't want to break my old man's heart...

After all, he is the most important man in my life.

Caught In between

2011-04-26T23:40:00.002+08:00

I need the strength.

I need the answers.

I need a friend.

I felt lost and unfulfilled in this journey. I was very contented before.

But now...

I felt something is missing. I felt a part of me has been taken away.

Is this truly what I had wanted?

Or is this how I am awarded for stepping on the pedal?

The look

2011-04-24T11:05:00.005+08:00

I remember that look. My fairytale reliving itself.

When I walked into the room.

The awe in your mouth..

The frozen moment..

The sparkle in your eyes... says it all.

You did it all, so effortlessly.

Such a natural.

And I will always remember the look.

A deserted campus

2011-04-21T20:31:00.003+08:00

Easter's long holiday is finally here. Campus is literally empty for the time being. Long holidays in HK is really rare; unlike Msia. We were too slacking and unfortunately, still.

So.... What will I be doing?

Well, I have a few good books to keep me company. Plus, all the time in the world to do whatever I want. And lots of drops from the sky to keep me curled up in bed the whole day. Spacious gym and all the luxurious access to any equipments I want. No queue!!!

Hopefully.

Nevertheless, will be a nice weekend of a much needed rest...

The rare speech

2011-04-20T22:42:00.005+08:00

These words will always ring in my ear.

"You have learned and achieved a lot;
especially considering where you have come from."

"I'm surprised and truly amazed at
how tolerant and enduring of a person you are."

Thanks boss.

Those are the kindest words I need at one of the bottom-est time of a head damaging journey.

Simple numbers

2011-04-17T23:19:00.001+08:00

My page views as of til tonight

Nice numbers!

Overwork kills

2011-04-14T21:28:00.002+08:00

Spending too much time at work can be the ultimate reason we lose ourselves, body, mind and soul. Don't take it for granted that you are still young and having plenty to fight for.

What is the price in place for the gamble?

The following post is from People's Daily Online.

Pan Jie, 25, died on Sunday of acute cerebral meningitis, which is caused by a viral or bacterial infection. Symptoms include severe headache and fever.

"Based on her symptoms and her low white blood cell count, it's reasonable to conclude that overwork led to a weakened immune system, which makes her more vulnerable to infections," Wang said. "When an infection worsens over time, people can develop acute cerebral meningitis."

Pan seemed to be aware something was wrong. On March 31, Pan wrote on her microblog: "Whenever there's a chance to take a break, a fever comes. My body, I am at a loss whether I should praise you for being understanding or just the opposite."

"I can accept overtime. I can also accept out-of-town business trips. But on learning a young worker died from fatigue at kp (KPMG), I feel something has broken my bottom line to endure," she wrote.

To be honest, I am scared. I worked more than 12hours a day, 7days a week. And my boss don't give a damn. I should quit my job. But I can't.

Tomorrow I shall run again

2011-04-10T13:29:00.006+08:00

Working out to de-stress yourself is a good thing. Something you can achieve although you are all alone. A feeling of accomplishment. Satisfaction comes along. The sweat is all for good.

Run!!
as if there's no tomorrow.

Ran!!
as if yesterday did not happen.

Continue running!!
as if today is your last.

Don't look back..

Run! Run! Run!

Can't run away from it

2011-04-09T12:50:00.002+08:00

Need to be so obvious meh?

Joy is a wellbeing

2011-04-06T23:35:00.004+08:00

FACT #1
It is difficult to stop feeling happy.

Well, in the first place, nobody asked you to make yourself miserable. Drop it and come out of your zombie shell.

FACT #2
You know being unhappy won't do you good.

Worst, it affects people around you; who loves and cares for you. Time to shudder off unhappy pessimistic thoughts.

Put on your thinking cap. That's it! Get on the groove. You can do it! Just follow the flow...

Pssstt!!!
I have a personal recommendation. It is called joy!

Credit : Peekaboo IPHONE App

Nothing

2011-03-31T00:53:00.000+08:00

When you can do nothing,
what can you do?

Zen Mondo

Communication

2011-03-28T21:38:00.003+08:00

It is difficult to be expressive. It is difficult to express what's on your mind, in your soul; left hanging at your lips. It is difficult to capture the moment. It is difficult to utter the right words at the right time. It is difficult to deliver a point that matters. It is MOST difficult to let others understand how you feel. That's why we have communication barrier.

Shit happens

2011-03-27T09:57:00.002+08:00

Sundays.. Could be the only day in a week that you look forward to. Especially when you work 2types of job for more than 12hours a day for 6 consecutive days in a week. Unfortunately, not every Sunday can be as enjoyable as it seems. Who wants to get bombarded by bad news again and again? Like they say, 'Shit happens'.

Rainbow and rain

2011-03-27T09:43:00.002+08:00

If you want the rainbow, you should put up with the rain.

Dolly Parton.

Taken for granted

2011-03-26T18:15:00.002+08:00

Have we loved our father enough?

I just learned that my colleague's dad literally died dropped dead. He was walking on the street and fell down and died. Just like that. Of course, the news was well hidden and I learnt it secretly from my boss.

The girl is still quite young and so far away from her home in the Europe. The news must be a horrible one. She have grown quiet and vary of everyone in the department. She is not as cheerful as before. It was quite sad, now that I learnt that she had gone through all that by herself.

Dad, I miss you terribly.

Life as a teacher assistant

2011-03-21T23:48:00.003+08:00

Half marking lab assignments, I fell asleep.

Now I think of it,

I don't think I am suitable to be a teacher...

Then again,

I don't think the students want me to be their teacher...

... which is totally fine with me!!!

Work ethics

2011-03-21T21:32:00.000+08:00

Hard work pays off in the future.

Lazy-ness pays off now.

I have a bigger heart

2011-03-19T20:49:00.005+08:00

Most of the time, I am very serious, dedicated, responsible and concern in things that matters most in my point of view. Recently, I found out that my attentiveness towards little things that seem unimportant to others, is inviting heartbreak. To me. I also found out that people tend to take advantage of such vulnerable side of me.

So, I will learn to let go. No anger. No prejudice. No bad feelings.
I forgive all of you.
I felt relieved and lifted.
Because I learned that my heart is bigger.

The sweetest thing

2011-03-18T23:05:00.001+08:00

The sweetest thing,

"The spaces between your fingers were created so that mine could fill them in."

Tweeting on Japan's catastrophe

2011-03-17T00:57:00.007+08:00

This is my first experience reading updates from twitter. Rare for me, but I find it very amusing. Some meaningful tweets to share :

More click here.

Such an inspiration to the whole world.

It's a shame if you don't feel it. This is what we call spiritual strength.

Movies so worth watching, they are ................

2011-03-16T00:20:00.007+08:00

3DSanctum . BlackSwan

compelling.

exhilarating.

wicked.

tremendously panicking.

critically thrilling.

intensely horrifying.

utterly disturbing.

because,
it is a reflection of our life.

Strangers at heart

2011-03-15T00:33:00.007+08:00

She might turn left. I might turn right.

We might be strangers.

But we still meet at the intersection.

And we cross each other's path, unknowingly.

They are our hope

2011-03-14T20:20:00.003+08:00

Our hope. Our future.

Love this shot.

Credit : Cheeky Monkey Photography

Quake, Tsunami & Nuclear - What could be worse?

2011-03-12T20:19:00.008+08:00

Second largest earthquake measuring 8.9 shooked Japan triggering a tsunami and caused catastrophic damage to the island.

Blast at Japan's nuclear power plant is a huge reminder of history trying to repeat itself. Chernobyl 1986 and Three Mile Island 1979.

The world should be responding in a frenzy now. But looking at FB, I felt disappointed. People updating about how bad food tastes, how uncomfortable their life is, how it sucks to be flying a low cost flight, how slow their pc are, how much they are reminded of WWII....

Has everyone been too easy in their comfort zone?

Have they forgot how to be thankful?

Do they not feel too blessed?

Good vs Bad

2011-03-12T19:31:00.002+08:00

I am a non-superstitious karma believer.

When you do bad, you deserve bad things in return.
When you do good, you will always be blessed with good things in return.

Simple maths from mother's womb.

And so, I believe in karma.

What you shouldn't say in front of your boss

2011-03-12T18:53:00.002+08:00

G : Hey Teng, come join us for a drink!

T : No I can't. Thanks for the invite.

G : You were doing so well at the pool game!!!

N : Yeah, and you guys did it after I left!!!

T : Yeah, and I was unprotected.

Oooppssss................. I felt instant suicidal.

My new disbelief

2011-03-12T17:53:00.004+08:00

I want to start disbelieving people.

Not because of what they say, but..

because they are unbelieveably fake.

Happy for you

2011-03-06T23:40:00.002+08:00

I am happy for you.

I am.

And you know who you are.

Whale Sharks

2011-03-03T21:15:00.005+08:00

Avid marine enthusiast always dreamt of whale shark encounters. The most gentle of giants in the vast sea. But, not like this.....

Three whale sharks were spotted in Koh Lanta.

Two died within a week.

Cause : suspected trawling activities.

Read here.

The secret recipe

2011-03-02T18:39:00.011+08:00

Behind every two, there is a certain recipe for happiness.

Try this :-

+ A handful of faith
+ A tablespoon of determination
+ A cup of hiccups
+ Lots of loves
+ Sprinkles of adventure
+ Garnish with some fun, cheer & laughter!

P.S. I Love You.

Sometimes, we need to chuckle in some evil giggles too! ;)

Happy Cooking!!!

Sweet dreams

2011-03-01T18:25:00.004+08:00

May your lips curve into a sweet smile tonight

Ma'Cake Edible Art

Enlightening

2011-03-01T00:57:00.002+08:00

Sometimes the most important thing in that whole day, is the rest we take in between two deep breaths.

Cold spell

2011-02-27T00:40:00.003+08:00

Yes. I need to break the cold spell here. Recovering very slowly from bug attacks. Realized my energy reserve is all used up for winter.

Be praised, there is a lot of sun coming in lately!! Seasons changing. SPRING!!!! Time to slowly pack away wools and fleeces. Welcoming the sun, rain, wind, birds chirping and flowers!

Another reason for not blogging lately was the tremendous pressure from work and research. Learning BIG time.

Let me heat up a little bit more.
Reigniting in no time! ;)

Webby webs

2011-02-24T23:31:00.001+08:00

If spiderman is here, he would be so exhausted.

Prejudice

2011-01-24T16:55:00.002+08:00

Prejudice is a strong word.

I'm using it because I'm being prejudiced by a professor in my department. I was being questioned about my teaching ability. I was being degraded of my academic status. I was ridiculed of my achievements in science. In front of an entire class. I had tried not to pay attention to it several times, ignoring his permanent unrest discrimination against me.

I really want to find out the reason why, and the degree of 'crime' that I've committed (did anything even happened???) for me to deserve such humiliation. My race? My nationality? My work? My field of interest? My gender?

People with higher authority are abusive.
They abuse power.

Oh.... Monday is really blue...
=(

Coming to my senses..

2011-01-23T22:13:00.005+08:00

Life is often full of challenges that twist already-made decisions and tried very hard to keep both your feet off the ground. Turning opposite directions just to make you face yourself upside downs.

Sometimes, you are so stucked at these intersections, that there is nothing you can do to change the harm done but to accept it and then, move on.

Because change is so permanent, I've found out that avoidance is not a good mode of learning. Life is about accepting change and learning to adapt to it. It is also about being happy, sidetracks aside. Ultimately, making sure that your feet is still on the ground.

The most difficult writing

2011-01-18T23:43:00.008+08:00

Obituaries, are the most difficult piece of writing.

I'm writing one tonight..
because I know,
you are much more loved by above
and you deserve better... much better..

In Loving Memory of Leopard (perd)...

March 2003 - January 2011

A strong, alert, thoughtful and most possible companion at all times. We walked through thick and thins, jumped through high and lows, sneaked through narrow and broads. My wake-up calls in the mornings when your soft whiskas poked my face and your soft paws paced forth and back, heavy on my chest. An eager play companion whenever the strings played. A cheeky follower whenever I waltz my way to the coconut tree in front of our home. A coward when it's time to go to bed. A thief making holes in all our doors. A silent sleeper who enjoy her own sweet time on my bed. A poser to test for my camera shots. A patient listener. A humble girl when your belly were teased. A moaner for the wet baths you had to take. A fighter through the flood that I picked you up. A baby held humbly in my arms at any time. Love at first sight for many. My first pet. My ball of fur. My baby.

I will always miss you deeply. For I, have not enough of your beautiful presence. Always in my silent prayers and a delicate spot in my heart.

You will always, forever, be with us.

We will always love you.

- Tiger (ger) and I -

Dog speaks loyalty

2011-01-18T10:20:00.002+08:00

cnn.com.

Leao sat next to Cristina's grave, undisturbed, for days.

Your journey..

2011-01-17T15:13:00.005+08:00

I wasn't there the moment you first learned to breathe
But I'm on my way
On my way
I wasn't there the moment you got off your knees
But I'm on my way
On my way

Lay down
And come alive in all you've found
All you're meant to be
And for now
We'll wait until the morning light
And close our eyes to see
Just close your eyes to see

A tear must have formed in my eye
When you had your first kiss
But I'm on my way
On my way
So leave a space deep inside for everything I'll miss
Cause I'm on my way
On my way

Lay down
And come alive in all you've found
All you're meant to be
And for now
We'll wait until the morning light
And close our eyes to see
Just close your eyes to see

And when you feel no saving grace
Well I'm on my way
On my way
And when you're bound to second place
Well I'm on my way
On my way
So don't believe it's all in vain
Cause I'm on my way
On my way
The light at the end is worth the pain
Cause I'm on my way
On my way

I'll be there the morning you come out in white
Cause I'm on my way
On my way

Short-lived recovery

2011-01-16T20:53:00.010+08:00

This is difficult for me, evidently becoming more challenging and hard to deal with. I am so tested. I've just managed to re-adjust my life here, and again, news struck.

After a series of fallouts and unhappy events, I finally found enough conscience to pull myself together and embrace the realities which were hitting me. I switched gears and let bygones be bygones. I always find ways to pack up courage and start anew. Planting seeds of optimism and positivity in me, and throw myself in an ocean of uncertainty again. Hardship to me, before half an hour ago, was just 'something' needing time and more practise.

But, grieve to me.... is crushing.

I'm a tough lad, shapen through time. I've learned to be very tolerable and endures extreme threshold levels. I'm independently good at managing my own life in a very organized way no matter how rough things become. However, limits are limits.... Especially when reality slaps you hard repeatedly on your face.

I want to grieve... for my loss.

I can't help it, but I'm crushed.

Surviving winter

2011-01-10T18:24:00.004+08:00

Hong Kong has been under really cold weather this winter. Colder and drier than it has been, just like how it was during the 90s.

No matter how much you like air-conditioning, trust my words. You will not like sitting in a freezer 24-7, trying to do your things like how you did at all other seasons.

The cold thing about HK is the strong chilly wind. Brrrrrrr....... Because HK's winter is never with snows (it did snow at one of the mountain peak), there are no heating system. So, you can only wrap yourself in winter clothing and hope that you cramped enough of heat to rock you to sleep at night.

Like I said, it is cold.

Worth of a thousand words

2011-01-07T14:59:00.005+08:00

A thousand things that I want to share
with you.

Braving the steps

2011-01-06T13:35:00.005+08:00

I wonder if what I said in my conversation with my sister would be held against me?
I wonder....ME:
i found a new meaning to my phd
i dont have to complete it
because i already knew what i can achieved

SHE:
hahahaha... yes

ME:
and i dont want to achieve it for someone else

SHE:
it's all yours...

ME:
i dont want o help nathalie anymore
i cannot save the world

SHE:
no one can take it from you even if you want to give it away...

ME:
i cannot establish a southeast asia zone

SHE:
you alone cannot...

ME:
i cannot be the best in southeast asia
not because i am not
but because i dont need to prove so hard to be one
i dont want to care what she thinks of my work anymore
not because it doesnt matter
but it matters so much to me, than it matters meaningless to her
i am reluctant to help her solve her puzzle

SHE:
totally agree with you...

ME:
she needs a proper way to do so
i tried to help her,
but without her selfless act, i am a soldier fighting my own war
if she has a personal life to deal with, so do i
i am not forever mortal

SHE:
so you don't want to be the general, major, captain, lieutenant, rookie etc etc etc anymore???

ME:
huh?

SHE:
you go to war mah...

ME:
i am the recruit
always the frontline
to die first

SHE:
one person war so have to wear all rank lor
hahahahah
yeah lor...

ME:
.............
now i know why everybody leaves
this place is not worth staying at all
if i chose to leave,
it doesnt mean that im useless
or im not determined enough to stay put and endure
but it is because im finally strong enough
after learning and achieving so much
and earned a doctorate on my own
the recognition, doesnt have to come from somebody else
life is too short for them

Today, I remembered you

2011-01-05T21:11:00.003+08:00

Tonight,

I confronted my diary of fears.

In it I opened up you...

Today,

Your home served as a saviour.

To a kitty, another victim to humanity.

I'm proud of you, Coffee.

A memory determined to last a lifetime...

Missing you.

Fears

2011-01-03T23:41:00.002+08:00

One of my biggest fear is playing with blades.

Tomorrow I'm going to be tested on one.

Blade oh Blade, Please don't fly out.

Fear oh Fear, Please subside.

Grrrrrr

2011-01-03T23:38:00.002+08:00

I wonder what happen to my space between each paragraphs?????
Why must it keep disappearing????
This is irritation.

This is random.

Habitual blogger

2011-01-03T22:40:00.005+08:00

I did not realize that I blog that much last year compared to all the other years of my bloggings. I thought I wrote too little in that little pathetic year. But, it was current record holder for the most posting in Sunshine@360.

Perhaps I've got a certain habit for blogging. I should start surveying my desire for writing. What makes me write? When I can't even finish writing up my work proposal even after 15months?

As I glanced back at my blog titles for 2010 and the year before, I sensed that the style of writing had differed, alot. Indeed, things had been diferent. Way too different to maintain their origins. Maybe that's how we grow as we continue learning.

Who says learning stops when we leave school?

Your presence matters

2011-01-02T00:59:00.006+08:00

It felt really good, to finally share my life in HK with those who matters most to me. Though I'm sitting alone in my room now and then, but the feeling is not going to be the same again. Their presence still lingers strongly wherever I go.

Carrying them close to my heart, reminds me how well I've been surviving alone in HK all these while. Now, even better with their continuous blessings and silent prayers. Keeping me stronger and embraced in unseen warmth.

Thanks to them, I know my battle has been worthwhile. The battle is already half won.

Bliss.... I finally felt lighter.

This is for all of you - FAMILY.

Approx a year ago...

2011-01-01T23:30:00.015+08:00

Me approx. a year ago....

...and now

I sat down for one day, thinking of what to write on this first night of 2011.

............................................................................................................
I have gained more than what I've imagined for the past 1 year.

I have gained more strength to embrace uncertainties in life.

I have let go of what should not be held on,

and look forward to what's going to surprise me.

I have adapted to changes and variabilities,

so often that I accept change is unpredictable and yet undeniable.

********************************************************

With that,

I have vowed to embed what I've learned to be lessons in life.

I have regained conscience of not letting unimportance to hurt me.

I have learned, how to be a happier person for what makes me happy,

and not to be sad for what would sadden me.

I have given myself a second chance, and I took the big step.

And, I'm glad I found a bigger heart for mine.

********************************************************

Now,

I have deeper sense of realizations, of how meaningful every moment is in my life.

Trying not to waste any second of my time,

to mourn for what's not worthy of a second thought.

I am trying, to make life a better place for myself.

So that it would be better for you.

********************************************************

Thank you, an eventful and challenging 2010...

I have achieved a lot in a year's time.

I am proud of who I am today for the level of determination I had polished within me.

I've grown a little more wiser than who I was before.

I just need to love myself more in this coming year.

And I need to remember, I cannot save the world.

********************************************************

I believe,

I can be a better person.

And a very happy, better person.

Christmas 2010

2010-12-20T21:16:00.003+08:00

My Christmas is going to be a unique celebration this year. I'm glad, it's with my loved ones.
I hope yours would be a good one too.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

A holiday....

2010-12-20T20:18:00.003+08:00

Everyone in my office has left for their respective holidays. Back to their own home (I mean country)... celebrating with their loved ones...

Alex said to me, "Merry Christmas!!!" before she left the office just now. I turned and asked her, "You're leaving already??" She answered yes excitedly, and bid goodbye to her pathetic office table opposite mine. :)

I don't realize time travelled that fast.

It's 20mins past eight now... And I'm still in the office.

Life, trial and error

2010-12-15T23:25:00.005+08:00

I think, I'm a very happy person.

I deserve, for what I've done.

I have, indeed achieve a lot.

I did, try my best.

I could, not ask for more.

I am, contented and grateful.

I must, be the most loved person in life.

My life.

Twisted. Turned. Spurred. Spanned. Stirred. Rotated. Ridiculed. Crumbled. Cracked. Corrupted.

And still be it. So what?

I'm learning to enjoy it.

No longer fighting it, nor develop negativity towards it.

Embracing every short moment of my wonderful life.

Reflect, relax and return.

Loving love in return for love.

Aaahhh...

Life is, to get up again after every fall.

Just a few scratches...

A breakaway from work

2010-11-19T23:47:00.001+08:00

7 Things you should stop doing at work

1. Being too busy for breaks (you’re better at everything when you’re rested).

2. Replying to email instantly (if they’re really waiting, they’ll call you).

3. Getting caught up in politics (it’s rarely worth it and never fun).

4. Pretending you’re saving lives (if you actually are, no need to pretend).

5. Refusing to give yourself uninterrupted time for work (they don’t need you that much).

6. Complaining about how little money you make (the people you’re complaining to can’t change it).

7. Forgetting to laugh and have fun (this can take work some days but is always worth it).

Bonus round: Stop eating lunch at your desk. You really deserve a walk, conversation with a friend, or a quiet hour away from your desk.

Courtesty of Stepcase Lifehack

I am no God

2010-11-14T20:01:00.003+08:00

It's very difficult to be surrounded by friends who won't relief themselves off the negativity hook. Most of the time, you, yourself are trying so hard to make ends meet, to fight for your own life and trying to make the world a better place for everyone.

These friends can't stop being stuck in their sad, depressed and unhappy state. They fight, debate and argue - senseless, with you. People who tend to complicate their minds for the simplest matter and blame the world for what they have become. Those who thought they are blessed but cannot be grateful for who they are. And they question you when you answered, 'why', 'no', 'not', 'dont want' etc.

And these friends...

They caught you off guard

...when they say things that hurts.

They caught you further off guard

...when they have suicidal thoughts.

They crushed you

...when they blame it on life, family and religion.

They crushed you further

...when they don't think you were there for them.

No matter how much you tried to turn their life around, cheering them on, opening their life to a whole broader world, patting their backs, accompanying them all the way, stay still when the whole world shook for them. And yet, they crawled back to their comfort zone, and be a recluse against the world.

I tried. Sadly, I failed to help you.

Sigh...

Friend, I am no God. I think, you need one.

Something I forgot to tell Serena

2010-11-08T20:10:00.010+08:00

I was reading on isotopes until my small eyes weakened, nodding away. So, I scavenged through my small and yet FULLY OCCUPIED table for a bookmark. Then, I came across this...

I was trying to recall who spelled my name wrongly on this lovely 'Green' card. And suddenly, my mind came clear. And I got freshened up instantaneously. So, I started writing... a long conversation.

Last summer, I wanted to know more about one of the climate event happening in campus. I approached this sweet petite girl. Serena is one of the lucky Hong Kong student who got selected for those highly publicised Antarctica journey for university students. A westerner was right behind me when we both stepped in the booth.

I : Hi! This looks interesting to me.
Serena : Hi! Take a look at our campaigns. And the information on the posters.
W : [smile]
Serena : Hey! Do you know what's Climate Change? Have you heard about it? Let me show you here.
W : ok. [looking away fidgeting under the hot sun]
I : [a bit shocked but still manage to smile]

So, Serena was elaborating big time about her adventure in Antarctica with her new friend W. I stood next to her fancy Mac and listened as she explained hyperactively to W all about the Climate and the disastrous changes taking places. Then...

Serena : You can register here if you wish to know more about us.
W : Ok.
Serena : Thank you, W!!!
I : Erm, hey Serena, what's that registration about? Can you tell me more?
Serena : Ok. Just register your details here. [smile, i think it was]
I : Can you show me the English language?
Serena : [puzzled] Ok...
I : Unfortunately, I don't know how to read Chinese [smiled and continued with registering].

W was leaving. So, Serena scribbled something on a card.

Serena : Hi W, this is for you!
W : Thanks.
Serena : What's your name?
I : Teng T-E-N-G. It goes double.

Serena wrote my name on it. First looking at it, and then looked away while writing the one behind. That explains the picture above.

Serena walked away and 'sent' W off.
I went over and told her you got my name wrong. She just asked my name again and then, took her pencil and 'erased'.

I : Thanks [smiled]
Serena : Welcome!

Serena,
THANK YOU for giving me the card.
I am grateful.

You don't have to remember my name,
but I think, you have to remember yours...

Blog design

2010-11-05T19:05:00.001+08:00

The biggest achievement that I've done to design my blog is the picture above.

It's going to stay there for a long long time.

That's it.

Sleep

2010-11-03T00:32:00.001+08:00

Zzzz please come peacefully to me...

The difference between my neighbour and I

2010-11-01T23:34:00.005+08:00

Ackley, Sophie and TT

Ackley : Hey TT, this is Sophie.

Sophie : Hi. [and looked elsewhere]

TT : Hi Sophie!! Erm, hello! [confused]

TT : Are you from HKU?

Sophie : Mm. [and looked away]

Ackley : Sophie's from Biological Sciences. [trying to connect dots]

TT : Ok. [smile]

TT : So, you're a grad student from HK?

Sophie : I'm half Australian. Half Singaporean.

TT : Oh, I see. [smile]

Sophie : You?? YOu are M'sia right??? [eyes rolled]

TT : Yeah, I'm your neighbour. [calmly]

Sophie : Ah. That's what I thought. You can't be S'porean. You're too polite. [look who's talking]

TT : [smile]

-pointless chatter took place over wine between the three. 90% of the time, Sophie was all over Ackley.

Sophie : Hey, let's go grab dinner, shall we? [looking entirely at Ackley]

Ackley : Sure! [who have been looking at TT all the time]

Sophie : great [still looking at Ackley]

TT : Great! Then you guys can go ahead without me. I've other dinner to attend to.

Ackley : Awww... too bad... You sure?

Sophie : [failed to hide her wide curved lips] Really??!!

TT : Yup, you guys have fun. [smile]

TT : Nice to meet you Sophie [smileeeeeee]

TT : Take care!

Sophie : You too. [mimicking a cat's purring]

Sophie : Ok! Let's go. [aimed at Ackley]

Sophie : Bye.

In the end, TT could not retrieved her rolling head...

oh, by the way, Ackley is a blond American.

Love well rewinded

2010-11-01T22:49:00.001+08:00

Love is friendship that catches fire;
it takes root and grows one day at a time.
Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfections;
it is REAL.
~ Barbara Bartlein

The Snooze Button

2010-10-28T00:00:00.002+08:00

phdcomics

Yummyliciousss!!!

2010-10-27T19:46:00.001+08:00

Hey, where did you buy those?

Errr... I cooked them.

A drop of pin...

2010-10-25T20:14:00.000+08:00

That's how silent it has been.

Thank you Megi

2010-10-24T13:52:00.005+08:00

It's funny how humans [not quite sure about the animal kingdom] cannot be grateful and contented with what they have.

Megi was scheduled to hit Hong Kong last Thursday - expected to be the strongest storm to ever hit the region, bringing heavy downpour, mudslides, shutting down the mega city and definitely halting the economy. HK was prepared for it, and people were seen busy getting ready to embrace the wild storm and stocking up food at home.

The forecast went from Typhoon Signal No. 1 and rose up to 3 and stayed there until Wednesday. Miraculously, sun was shining brightly on Thursday, with the slightest breeze felt throughout the day. The weekend was tremendously fine, just ripe for the autumn season.

Super typhoon had decided to spare HK of it's massive killer strength and travel much north and brought other neighbouring regions battling with it.

However, not everyone felt grateful that they escaped what could possibly be the worst state of devastation that they could have ever imagined. Some started cursing the HK Observatory for the fluctuating forecast and condemned their reliability.

Little did they had in mind, how lucky we were at this stage.

270,000 flee, as typhoon hits China

And the fact that, we're a small little island, standing next door to them.

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if got sick, at least we didn't die; so let us all be thankful.
[Buddha]

Educational comedy

2010-10-22T22:36:00.000+08:00

Why am I here now?

2010-10-22T22:33:00.003+08:00

" Teng,

You are being trained to be a Professor.

Not to be a student. "

Do you realize that?

Present, future and past

2010-10-19T01:32:00.001+08:00

To mark the start of our journey into this world,
We are born into the present.

As we grow up and older,
We look forward to the future.

When we leave this world,
We left behind a past.

The passing of time

2010-10-18T22:47:00.004+08:00

I must remind myself constantly, HK is just a hitch-hiking point for me. I'm just going to be around for 4 years. A year has gone by noticeably. Maybe because I kept track of time so closely. I had wanted those awful 12 x 4 = 48 months to move on quickly.

I had wanted to rewind my life at some point too. I thought my life could virtually practice clicking the UNDO button. I had wished the nightmare wasn't true and I did not have to go through what I was tested on. But I'm glad I did not. For I wouldn't have the opportunity to open my heart again.

I foresee the next 3 years is going to pass by swiftly, but of course, there would be a lot of challenges ahead.

What is life if there's nothing for us to reflect on?

It's only 3 x 12 = 36-2 (for the 2months passed) => 34 months away...

Sun sets in Autumn

2010-10-14T00:30:00.000+08:00

One of the beautiful sunsets in HK.

I love the view from my new office.

Perhaps.....

I should try to love my office more.

Where is the Sun after each rain?

2010-10-14T00:26:00.001+08:00

I am Sunshine.

Rainbow, where have thou gone to?

Happy 3 years old!

2010-10-13T21:40:00.001+08:00

It's been 3 years down the road.............

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY FAITHFUL BLOG!!!

Is it the 2,512.186 km or the 4 hours ?

2010-10-13T20:30:00.004+08:00

How come it seems so far?

You and Me

2010-10-11T23:29:00.003+08:00

We left our footsteps at Aonang.

Faith would lead us back there.

Depression signs

2010-10-05T19:55:00.005+08:00

Some of the depression signs that often go unnoticed. Have we been neglecting ourselves?

1. You feel sad, dissatisfied or pessimistic most of the time, although you still have days when you feel normal.

2. Your appetite changes.

3. You're tired most of the time.

4. You have insomnia or you're sleeping too much.

5. You're harder on yourself than you should be.

6. You're not working at your peak, and you're having trouble concentrating.

7. Simple decisions somehow take forever.

8. You feel that every day is more or less a struggle.

Adapted from : Are you secretly sad [Tracy Thompson;Oprah.com]

There's a need to learn to love yourself more.

Careers that depress you

2010-10-05T19:08:00.003+08:00

Is your job stressing you out?

Check out whether your career is the actual thing that made you depressed.

10 careers with high rates of depression.

I'm sure mine is.

Blog as you walk

2010-09-15T01:52:00.001+08:00

Blogging from your phone is just too fun.The power of technology. How can you hate technology? The cyber power.

I hit the target!!!

2010-09-05T16:03:00.003+08:00

Yes, after more than 3years,

TADA!!

Well, is it because of my own clicking or are they contributed by visitors?
Ponder...

Women at stake

2010-09-05T12:12:00.006+08:00

Sanam Bibi@Gul, a 47 years old pregnant widow was killed in Afghanistan. She was accused of adultery which caused her to be impregnated. She was also whipped 200 times prior to her execution.

- More on Taliban-ism.

Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, 43 years old is a mother of two, faced allegations of adultery in 2006. She was sentenced to die by stoning. Her news caught the international audience and draws the attention of human rights for the seemingly injustice ruling.

As if adding salt to a wound is not enough, Iran sentenced her to another 99 lashes "on false charges of spreading corruption and indecency by disseminating woman's picture without a hijab presumed to be her" for something she is not involved at all! Her lawyer was the one who produced the pictures. Full story of Sakineh here.

-More on Syariah.

I cannot imagine if Malaysia established their interpretation of Syariah law to non-muslims. I am happier if Malaysia can be more liberal, accept, appreciate and fully make good use of the diverse cultures in tour system.

Malaysia is a happy place, if they can see out of their own boxes.

Bored in lingerie

2010-09-04T15:25:00.004+08:00

I have always miss this friend of mine.. ever since she had gone back to her home..

I will remember not to forget you

The one whom I never realized to be such an impact on me..

Happy 1st Anniversary

2010-08-31T22:00:00.006+08:00

Hi Hong Kong,

I remembered clearly 01/09/2009. The first time I stepped into Hong Kong. A foreign land. No idea of what awaits me. No expectation of what lies ahead. Not well prepared to embrace the cultural shock and differences. Not knowing that I'd sustain here until now.

I vividly recall when I first step down from the plane. Ok. I was all alone. Lost and unsure. Blur and insecure. I really do not know, where did courage found its way and accompanied me all the way. It is indeed, a BIG step.

I still remember how shocked I was every time I had an encounter with Hongkie. Startled by their straight-forward and none-of-my-business manners, I was always victimised emotionally. Now, I understood. IT is in their culture. Sarcasm is their manners. Realistic is how they view. Highly system- and policy-oriented SAR. The business manifested society. A financial hub.

Hong Kong surprised me in many way, as much as how I surprised myself. And there's never an end to new discoveries and learning to overcome or embrace them. Small but compact. Flexible in many ways but still rigid.

Hong Kong proved to be a good touristy place. Excellent transportation. Informative resources. Accessible in every way. A planned society. Too many things to see and to be delighted with. But, only short term. Nobody would tourist for 4 years in Hong Kong.

One thing I learned, in a multicultural society, we blend in not by adapting and losing our own cultures. But to adapt and enrich the society with my culture. I am not a local, I am a foreigner.

I found the most ideal [quite] way to adjust to you. I just hope that your people would smile more. Coz I won't give up my smile.

Hong Kong, you're part of my life now.

HAPPY 1ST ANNIVERSARY...

In the arms of the Angel

2010-08-28T11:48:00.006+08:00

This is a very difficult post for me... Never the same again. Never..

It was a premonition gone right...

Please forgive me...

for i have not done my best to protect you...

for i disappoint you...

for i had chosen to leave..

for i did not choose to bring you with me...

for i had not spend enough with you..

for i did not prepare for the worst...

for i am helpless...

I am sorry Coffee..

There's nothing I can do, for you would never be in my arms again...

In Loving Memory of Coffee...

Nov 2007- Aug 2010...

You will always have my love with you..

Always will be remembered..

Please rest in peace.. there's SuSu, DaLian, Blackie and the rest..

I will be back to visit you...

My loyal two

2010-08-27T13:57:00.004+08:00

I'm sorry I can't bring you along..

I dearly wish I could safeguard all of you, all the time..

Please wait until I come back.. just wait..

I cannot afford to lose anymore..

I will be back,

this, is my promise to you.

Relationship ≠ work

2010-08-26T23:02:00.010+08:00

There is personal life in work.

And there is also work in personal life.

But, be clear, relationship is not work.

It's a relationship. It's not work. We cannot just set a goal, and aim to achieve it.

That's far too realistic, ignorant, shallow and cold.

Relationships, especially between two person in love, needs a lot of compromising, understanding and acceptance. They give, they take. They need time. They need space. They need the truth. They need exploration. They need supplements. They need intellectual feedbacks. They need a solid foundation. They need backup plans.

Nothing simple mentioned. Simplicity is just the gimmick for the mind.

Nothing straight-forward as well. Relationships are complicated in every ways.

Having a target means looking forward, good.

However, setting a target doesn't mean you have to score them.

Having too high of a target, sometimes succumbs you to your own expectations.

Maybe you thought you were ready, when you are not?

Or perhaps, the aim is too high beyond reach, at current?

Are you on the right track?

Worst, you both are having different targets???

Should you set aside and let patience and more understanding to grow over time?

We never know for sure, how our paths cross, how they divert and how we are lead back on together. Sometimes, no matter how much effort has been put in, things still fall apart. Because, you 'worked' too hard, alone. You need to look back at the essentials, communication. You need another team player, and you need to put trust in him/her.

In relationships, there are two workers. And rule of the thumb, is to work together. Put efforts to build up a groundwork where both parties contributed almost equally. One thing leading on to another - mostly bitter-sweet. The final product can well be envisioned as much as success comes drooling in. And what matters most, is how the entire working process takes place to pull things together.

Bear in mind, the success, is not yours alone. You did it with a partner, whom you can depend and work with for the rest of your life.

That's the one you need.

Relationships are like colours to a drawing.
When there are colours, the plain drawing becomes a painting.
When more colours set in, the painting becomes interesting.
When all colours blend in nicely, the painting becomes a work of art.

Reaching the set target, is just a bonus in the end.

Both parties share the merits.

Hong Kong's period of grief...

2010-08-26T21:39:00.006+08:00

Such a tragic end for Hong Kongers at Manila...

A day, nobody could be proud to have it listed in the history...

Who could have thought of a massacre while touristing?

All they wanted was just to travel abroad during the summer holidays.. with their loved ones.. before school reopens...

We watched, horrified with the live telecast... anticipated the outcome of the 10-hour standoff... clock ticked by too slowly for hope...

The worst had sounded... Hong Kong hearts are shattered..

Some are left widowed.. some orphaned.. some lost their dependants...

Just too much to bear..

People are scarred for life..

In a bus ride, hijacked by a lone gunman..

surrounded by 200 SWAT trained personnels...

snipers...

10hours of standoff...

2negotiators...

and, 1 simple request : secure and protect my people...

Philippines, who can stop blaming you?

Hong Kong has been weeping for the lives lost..

Hong Kong is in deep sorrow...

Hong Kong wants justice...

I hope that they find peace...

She's one sick lady!

2010-08-26T21:05:00.010+08:00

The Sun

She was stroking tabby Lola............ suddenly grabs the four-year-old cat ........ before throwing it into a wheelie bin and slamming the lid closed... [The Sun]

Terrified Lola was trapped..... 15 HOURS before her owners Stephanie Andrews-Mann and husband Darryl finally found her the following morning.... [The Sun]

Mary Bale, 45 :

"I really don't see what everyone is getting so excited about - it's just a cat."

"... I thought it would be funny to put it in the wheelie bin..." [The Standard]

p/s : At 45, we don't try to act cute and be funny.

Watch the video footage here : BBC Woman filmed dumping cat

Mother Teresa at 100 today

2010-08-26T09:40:00.006+08:00

When was your last time lending a helping hand to the orphans? the old folks? the handicapped? the needy? the homeless?

Let us touch the dying, the poor, the lonely and the unwanted according to the graces we have received and let us not be ashamed or slow to do the humble work.

Mother Teresa

Friends o friends...

2010-08-24T18:18:00.005+08:00

Friends o friends...

may the fake ones go away...
learn to be truthful someday...

may the opportunistic ones leave...
bet your chances not on somebody you care...

may the greedy ones disappear...
pray that your greed would not engulf you...

may the hateful ones go too...
hope that you find inner peace...

Friends o friends..

We've come so far not to be destroyed by what is ironic in this world..
We should envision pass all calamities...
We should prioritize what had been built throughout the decades...

I have appreciated your presence..
And I accepted all your flaws...
Please do not take advantage of what I have planted in all..

Friends o friends...

I am aware... Not deaf... Not mute... Not blind...
Just silent.

Friends o friends...

What do you know about Hong Kong?

2010-08-24T17:48:00.004+08:00

I asked some visitors on their knowledge of HK....

All they know about Hong Kong is...

kung fu

dim sum

chinese food

cheongsam

artist

fashion

cantonese

Oh boy, I'm glad they are tourists...

SUNSHINE @ 360°

Suspended

Luka Demokrasi..

Peludah Warna : A. Samad Said

Darwin started at home, young.

Abdul Samad Said

Hurmmm...

MJ impersonator

So long...

Or getting old?

Urchin sings too?

The Oceans by DisneyNature

An afternoon at work with Mr Zhuang

Words ringing in my head

Daddy, I want to come home

Caught In between

The look

A deserted campus

The rare speech

Simple numbers

Overwork kills

Tomorrow I shall run again

Can't run away from it

Joy is a wellbeing

Nothing

Communication

Shit happens

Rainbow and rain

Taken for granted

Life as a teacher assistant

Work ethics

I have a bigger heart

The sweetest thing

Tweeting on Japan's catastrophe

Movies so worth watching, they are ................

Strangers at heart

They are our hope

Quake, Tsunami & Nuclear - What could be worse?

Good vs Bad

What you shouldn't say in front of your boss

My new disbelief

Happy for you

Whale Sharks

The secret recipe

Sweet dreams

Enlightening

Cold spell

Webby webs

Prejudice

Coming to my senses..

The most difficult writing

Dog speaks loyalty

Your journey..

Short-lived recovery

Surviving winter

Worth of a thousand words

Braving the steps

Today, I remembered you

Fears

Grrrrrr

Habitual blogger

Your presence matters

Approx a year ago...

Christmas 2010

A holiday....

Life, trial and error

A breakaway from work

7 Things you should stop doing at work

I am no God

Something I forgot to tell Serena

Blog design

Sleep

The difference between my neighbour and I

Love well rewinded

Love is friendship that catches fire;it takes root and grows one day at a time. Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfections; it is REAL. ~ Barbara Bartlein

The Snooze Button

Yummyliciousss!!!

A drop of pin...

Thank you Megi

Educational comedy

Love is friendship that catches fire;
it takes root and grows one day at a time.
Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfections;
it is REAL.
~ Barbara Bartlein